Chloe - In Memoriam
March 13, 1994 - June 26, 2003
Click
the black square to turn off music.
Chloe's
Death: Waiting to be In My Arms
NEADS:
What You Can Do to Memorialize Chloe and Help Others
Photos
of Chloe (PDF
file - requires Adobe Reader which may be downloaded for free from http://www.adobe.com/products/acrobat/readstep2.html)
It is my very sad task
to announce that Chloe passed on Thursday, June 26, 2003 around 7:00AM. Chloe
was a pure bred Golden Retriever who was more than a highly trained and
certified assistance dog. She was an angel in disguise. She was with me
constantly day and night the day I was totally blessed to have received her in
March of 1994.
Chloe's
Death: Waiting to be In My Arms
Chloe and I flew to
Indianapolis to go to a wedding Friday, June 14. We drove to Champaign, went
to the wedding, met with some people, and then we drove to Cincinnati to visit
my mother and family for a few days. She was fine and doing well. I took her
to a park and she chased a few squirrels. On Thursday, June 20 we flew back to
San Diego. She had a very rough flight and developed what seemed like a cough.
She also developed a bladder infection. I took her to our Vet the next day and
they recommended a change of diet to address the bladder infection. On
Tuesday, June 24, she fell asleep with her head on my shoulder. She had
labored breathing and I had a difficult time sleeping hearing her breathing. I
woke up and she was obviously very sick. She also threw up. I took her to the
Vet on Wednesday morning and the Vet took some X-rays and found she had
pneumonia in her left lung. The Vet assured me she would recover. She sent me
home with antibiotics and some instructions. By mid-afternoon it was obvious
she was getting sicker. She could not keep the antibiotics down and I called
the Vet. They told me to bring her in and they kept her overnight. They put
her on an IV to hydrate her and gave her antibiotics. At around 6:00AM on
Thursday I received a phone call from my Vet. He told me that I needed to come
and get her and take her to an emergency critical care center. My roommate and
I raced over there. When I arrived to pick her up, the Vet said he thought I
should just let her go. I told him she was too young to die (9 1/2 years old)
and said I had to at least try. The Vet and an assistant put Chloe in my/her
jeep and my roommate raced us over to the critical care emergency center.
Chloe died in my arms in the car on the way over. All, I can say is she waited
and held on until she was in my arms. I saw and felt her take her final breath
and her last heart beat.
I received Chloe from
the National Assistance Dog Services (NEADS) of West Boyleston, MA who trained
her to be my service dog. At the time, I was working for the Institute for
Community Inclusion at Boston Children's Hospital. I became acquainted with
NEADS through a dear friend and colleague, Ms. Debra Hart and her Assistance
Dog, Vixen. Unfortunately, Vixen passed away in March of this year.
Chloe and I moved from
Boston during the Summer of 1996 to Champaign, Illinois where I went to work
for the National Transition Alliance at the University of Illinois. She and I
traveled from Champaign to Washington, DC so frequently that many of the
Airline attendants for American Airlines recognized her as we walked through
O'Hare Airport and boarded planes. While in Champaign she became best buddies
with another Golden Retriever, named Scarlet who lived with Dr. Paula Kohler,
a dear friend and colleague. Chloe and Scarlet were like sisters they were so
closely bonded. Chloe and Scarlet used to chew contentedly on the same bone
with absolutely no thought of being territorial. While at the University of
Illinois Chloe also developed a deep affection for another friend and
colleague, Dr. Tom Grayson. When we would get ready to go home, Chloe would
race down the hallway of the Children's Research Center, skidding into Tom's
office and she and Tom would have a virtual lovefest on his office floor.
From Champaign, IL we
moved to Portland, OR where she hung out with with a friend and colleague of
mine, Lisa Ferris and her guide dog, Mara. Then we moved back to Cincinnati,
OH where she and Petey, my parents dog became great buddies. We moved from
Cincinnati to San Diego in 1999.
Chloe brought joy and
love to the eyes of everyone she met. She was a magnet for people who wanted
to get to know her. She knew how to work a crowd. She would slowly, looking
over her shoulder to see if it was OK start mixing with people and eventually
she'd introduce herself to everyone in a party. She did this at receptions,
parties, and during the last few years in my classes that I teach at SDSU.
Chloe would often get
invited to social functions and then I would be invited (somewhat as an
afterthought) to come along. I think it was mostly so I could be her chauffer.
Chloe's first love was
the water. Anytime we could get to the beach, she was immediately in the
water. She swam the Atlantic, the Pacific, Lake Michigan, and some ponds and
lakes in between. She liked to hang out with me on the kayak. She'd lay down
on the kayak, take a snooze with a paw hanging over the side in the water as I
paddled on the Bay. Chloe also loved to play frisbee and fetch tennis balls
from the bay. She loved to chase squirrels and had a cat owned by my
parents who used to tease her that she liked to chase.
Chloe's devotion,
loyalty, love and service were absolute and unwavering. She taught me that
being able to accept help, love and service is a gift to the one who gives
such help, love and service selflessly. She never once complained. She was
always ready to play and was totally affectionate. She could never be petted
enough. She carried my handouts to class, picked up my car keys when I dropped
them on the ground, and gave me a something to catch my balance when I was
walking up stairs and up and down a boarding ramp. She was completely selfless
in her service and she always had the eyes that spoke about her total
dedication.
She was so proud of
herself when she fetched and carried her own leash. She was a queen of dogs
and had a sense of both presence and dignity but could easily decide to roll
herself in something that might smell totally interesting, if not, downright
nasty.
Most people understand
what it is to love an animal as a member of their family. Some don't and that
is a tragedy because animals require giving something of yourself without
expecting a thank you and learning things about our own humanity. However, an
assistance/service dog is far more than another member of the family.
An
assistance/service dog becomes an extension and integral part of your heart,
soul and spirit. When the dog is not with you, you feel a physical separation,
some deep part of you missing. You find yourself looking, checking, and
wondering how they are doing and where they are. There is a level of knowing
and communication that transcends words and ideas. You know things by the way
they walk, tug on the leash, look at you, position themselves, touch you, lay
down, jump, and run. A deep part of your heart and soul becomes one with the
dog's mind and spirit. This mutual love, devotion and service causes the dog
and their person to become one. And it is an experience that few have the
opportunity to acquire.
People with
disabilities with service dogs and guide dogs know and understand this
experience. Law enforcement officers and SAR personnel who have lost their
canine officers and partners in the line of duty understand this. But to have
the gift of this experience is also to carry the burden that comes with the
eventual loss. Most of us outlive our animals. To lose a service dog is
losing not only a part of one's life but of one's soul. Those who have
told me they understand because they had a pet they have loved and lost don't
know how little they understand. I too have had many pets I have loved and
lost. I have had another dog that I had to put to sleep because he was so old
and sick. As much as I hurt over the loss of the dog I had loved so much and
had put to sleep, that pain and hurt is completely and totally insignificant
in comparison to the loss of Chloe.
The loss of Chloe is so
great, the pain so intense, that one could not wish this on anyone. Nor could
one possibly suggest they understand unless they themselves had such a
closeness. Chloe was my shadow for almost 10 years. She was my pride, my joy,
my confidant, my consoler, my teacher, my friend, my helper, my social
coordinator, my angel, my sweetheart. I remember that her entire life I could
not believe how good she was. I was always telling her how good she was and
sometimes she'd just look at me and wonder what the big deal was. Her patience
and loyalty were absolute. And she demonstrated this until the moment she
died. I have yet to meet another fellow human being with anything close to her
patience, love and devotion.
NEADS:
What You Can Do to Memorialize Chloe and Help Others
All of the training
Chloe received was by the National
Education for Assistive Dog Services (NEADS) located in West Boyleston,
Massachusetts. This is an outstanding nonprofit charitable
organization. It is the organization that trained Chloe and I. It continues to
train service and assistance dogs and therapy dogs for people with
disabilities. If you are looking for a great place to make a charitable
contribution, please consider NEADS
and consider doing it in Chloe's name. For more information about
NEADS go check out their web page
or call their national office at (978) 422-9064.
IF YOU KNEW AND LOVED
CHLOE and want to memorialize her:
I
am asking you to memorialize Chloe’s dedication, love and service with a
contribution to NEADS in her name.
You
can make a contribution in one of three ways.
1)
You may make a secure online donation via their website at (http://www.neads.org/howtohelp/contribute.htm).
2)
You may call NEADS national office at (978) 422-9064 and make a contribution
by credit card or payroll deduction.
3)
Or you may send a check by mail.
For
the sake of convenience, you may click on “NEADS
Memorial Contribution Form” and send it in with your payment. This form
can be read and printed using Adobe Reader which may be downloaded for free
from http://www.adobe.com/products/acrobat/readstep2.html.
Cover
Letter (click here for cover letter)
NEADS
Memorial Contribution Form (click here for contribution form)
If
you decide to make a donation, PLEASE make sure to let NEADS staff know that
the contribution is a contribution for Chloe. Your contribution is tax
deductible as a charitable expense.
National
Education for Assistive Dog Services (Click here for more information
about NEADS)
You may also want to
consider donations to the following organizations who train animals to serve
people with disabilities in San Diego and California. I consider these
organizations to be reputable and provide outstanding service to people with
disabilities.
Tender
Loving Canines - Service Dogs
Please accept my deepest and heartfelt thank you for your
donation to NEADS on behalf of myself, Chloe and NEADS. Know that there is
absolutely no better way to memorialize Chloe than to contribute and support
the work of NEADS.
·
Photos
of Chloe (PDF
file - requires Adobe Reader which may be downloaded for free from http://www.adobe.com/products/acrobat/readstep2.html)
Questions?
Comments? E-mail me at johnson7@mail.sdsu.edu