Massage Chair Love in California
Massage chairs are good for more than just back pain and relaxation. They just might help you with the ladies too. Don't believe me? Well, you just sit back my friend, and listen to a story about my first day at college in California. It had been a long day in the southern California sun, going from car to dorm room with my boxes of hotplates, black lights and my Animal House poster. All your basic college stuff. By the time I got my lava lamp plugged in, it was time for a break. My father had a massage chair in his office at home, and so I was used to relaxing with a long massage chair session at the end of a hard day. When I read the campus guide earlier in the day, with University of California printed in big blue letters on the front, I noticed that there was a "relaxation room" on the top floor of the library. The relaxation room featured relaxing music and ergonomic chairs for reading. It also featured a massage chair, and a really nice massage chair too, a PHP-2026. This is the same same massage chair that my dad had in his office. I was thrilled that after dealing with narrow dorm stairwells and the August sun, finally I could relax with a nice massage chair.
The massage room was on the other side of campus, and so I grabbed my copy of Shakespeare's Taming Of The Shrew, which I was supposed to read over the summer, and headed over. Now California is hot in August, especially in Davis. I had never fully stopped sweating from my moving activities earlier, and I was instantly dripping sweat as soon as a I stepped out of the dorm into the quad. Little droplets vaulted off the front of my nose, landing like black beads in the dust. My thoughts were only on massage chairs.
Well, massage chairs and girls. I was in college after all. Two pony tailed lacrosse players were having an absentminded game of catch, and two other girls were tossing a frisbee in gentle arcs. Actually, there were women everywhere. There was one girl sitting on a bench outside the library, studying a book. She looked up at me and smiled as I passed. Blonde hair, blue eyes, and a red tank top that said Cougars. I smiled back at her as I went through the double doors, and started to think about the pact I had made with myself for college. I had vowed to be more confident with the ladies, because I had always been... what's the word? Terrified. Yes, terrified of girls, even just talking to them, but not anymore. I had promised myself that college would be different. Little did I know how true that was, and how I would be helped in that transformation by a massage chair.
Massage chairs are great, and I was looking forward to a little taste of home as I made my way into the library. The relaxation room was on the top floor, and as I climbed the stairs, I passed huge multicolored maps of California and life sized murals of grizzly bears and mountain lions. The relaxation room was empty. I guess no one was stressed out quite yet, on the first day of the school year. I sat down in the chair, and had a full fifteen minutes of bliss, expertly working the massage chair remote like the captain of a ship. I brought on some kneading and then followed it up quick with some tapping. Bring in the vibration and a little bit of heat. Like a maestro and his orchestra, I made that PHP-2026 premier massage chair play for me. Yes its cheesy, but screw you, I love massage chairs.
Massage chair heaven ended with a beep from the remote. After th 15 minute program in my massage chair, I decided to take a rest and maybe go for another round in a few minutes. After I was done, in a move that would have made my father proud, I reached over and unplugged the chair. See, there was no surge protector on the wall, and advanced machines like PHP-2026 chair should always be protected, especially with the crazy power surges in California. Surge protectors are something my father is fairly obsessive about. Any time he gets anything new and electronic, he gets a surge protector, and massage chairs are no exception. I figured I was doing a good thing by unplugging that massage chair. I did not know, however, the luck that would soon be brought to me by that massage chair.
I went into the lounge just outside the relaxation room, and settled down onto one of the overstuffed couches. Taming of the Shrew was giving me some trouble, what with all the "anons" and "thou arts". It was slow going to say the least, and I was just getting to the second act when I heard footsteps. It was the blonde in the red tank top, making her way toward the massage chair room. She smiled again, and this time said a small "hi". I said "hi" too, and I could feel my face get intensely, instantly flushed, but she was already through the door and out of sight. A moment later, she came out of the massage chair room looking disappointed, with a mock-frown face, "the massage chair's broken," she said. I started to tell her that it wasn't broken, that I had just unplugged it, but she cut me off and said, "how are you at back rubs?"
I was stunned. No, I was shocked, and completely tongue tied. I managed to stammer, "uh, pretty good I guess," and she heaved a sigh of relief before flopping down next to me on the sofa. "Thank god, my back is killing me. I was really looking forward to that massage chair." She smiled and stuck out her hand, "I'm Jen."